I’m sure you’ve never heard of a woman coming too soon. This may be because the woman can continue to have sexual intercourse after orgasm, whereas the man’s limb slackens off and needs a more or less long break. This can be very frustrating (not for the woman). This raises the question of how and whether one can stay in bed longer. Man and woman are fundamentally different and that is a good thing because they complement each other and opposites attract each other. But as already indicated there are also moments when these differences can become a “problem” – namely when the man does not hold out long enough.
You are not alone with the problem
In fact, many men struggle with this problem – more than you think. The reason why you might think you are alone is that most men are reluctant to talk about this problem.
Communication as a means against early arrival
Too early coming and a lack of stability in bed are not an issue that people like to peddle, but already a first tip for you: Talk to someone about it. You should not open it to a group of acquaintances, but take your partner by your side and describe the problem to him. There is a tremendous (performance) pressure on you and if you do not entrust it to someone, you will have to deal with it all by yourself. This pronunciation alone can sometimes help you to stay in bed longer.
If you don’t talk to your partner about it, it is more likely that you don’t understand your plight and that this lack of understanding manifests itself over time as frustration. It may sound exaggerated, but these negative effects have certainly brought one or the other relationship down the drain.
Causes not to last as long as you want
There are many different reasons why you may come too early. Too early is defined to the extent that you do not manage to bring your partner to the climax through penetration. Now you can roughly divide the problem sources into two “categories”:
- Physiological causes
- Psychic causes
These two problem areas occupy many men and when it comes to finding out whether there is a physiological (physical) problem, you probably only have to go to the doctor. This is also advisable if the problem is extreme and burdens you. You should not be afraid of this visit – even if you may feel a little queasy just thinking about it.
10 steps to a longer orgasm and Co. are often nonsense
There are now numerous gurus who want to sell you that you have found the ultimate way to hold out almost endlessly in bed and never come too early again. These listings for the “modern man” are usually not really to be taken seriously, but only aim to advertise a product at the end, which gives you nothing more than a hole in your wallet.
Through psychological briefing hold out longer
From holding out longer in bed by hypnosis for example you can now hold what you want, but there are actually possibilities to delay the orgasm by positive thinking. Common psychological causes for early onset are:
- Fear of failure and of coming too early – this regularly only increases the risk of premature ejaculation
- sexual pressure – an over-enthusiasm. You already think so much in advance that when you want to start, you are almost at the climax. The woman’s orgasm builds up slowly and is based on constant stimulation, whereby it can be that comparatively gentle and tender experiences lead to premature ejaculation in the man.
- Stress – this cannot be only a reason for impotence. It can also prevent you from staying in bed for long.
If you want to work on it, you have to face these factors and deal with them. In many cases, talking to a psychologist can also help, and you can try it yourself.
One way to stay in bed longer than a man can be to think of something less erotic during sexual intercourse. However, you should not exaggerate with it, because otherwise there is the danger that you either:
- to be impassive and to be noticed negatively by the woman.
- Or you get problems holding the erection, which in turn leads to a completely different problem.
For those who like it a bit more extreme, it can also be a way to bite your cheek firmly or your finger. This should ground some people a little and make sure that they are a little distracted and just hold on longer.
You’re to blame if you come too early
To last longer than a man is a dream that many people want and for good reason. Often a man is accused of being “selfish and selfish” when he comes too early. But often that’s not because he’s only concerned with his own well-being, but because he’s never learned to control his orgasm. So the cause is biological. In this sense, you should not feel guilty.
However, there are ways to stay in bed longer with household remedies, tips or even tablets. It is your responsibility to use them for yourself. And if it is only a few minutes that you win. These can make the small but fine difference as is well known.
Pelvic floor training for orgasm control
A lot of experience reports indicate that pelvic floor training can help a man to control his orgasm and to hold on longer. There are a lot of exercises on the internet that you can do to finally delay the orgasm with a trained pelvic floor by tensing.
There are now different techniques to use the strengthened pelvic floor muscles for yourself.
Squeezing technique for longer fun
The so-called squeezing technique should also be tried and tested. This is primarily about controlling your orgasm. You or your partner will bring you almost to the climax. Say: Until shortly before the “Point of no return”, but then stop and you squeeze your penis for 3 to 10 seconds just behind the glans.
If this time is not sufficient, you can extend it variable. You will find out the pressure-length and pressure strength over time, but you should proceed carefully to avoid serious bruising and the like.
This technique also has a psychological component. Those affected report that the conscious experience of tension, excitement and subsequent relaxation should have helped them to hold on longer.
Are tablets the solution to last longer in bed?
Yes and no. There are certain preparations on the market that have the potential to prevent ejaculation and thus ensure longer sex. The problem is that there are at least as many products on the market that do nothing at all and just pull the money out of your pocket.
finger away from stunning creams and the like
Stunning creams and the like are offered again and again, but you should keep your fingers off them. What may sound logical at first may have a bad effect on you, as these externally applied products often contain substances that cause allergic reactions or even displeasure. All in all, they are not suitable to avoid the climax, but they are a risk for your health.
Conclusion: Tablets and training are the solutions!
It is difficult to find an effective means and you should, therefore, listen to the advice of an expert and read the testimonials carefully. It has been proven that tablets, which are usually a conglomerate of different potent household remedies, can last longer in bed. Not coming too early and pampering your partner again is therefore within your reach. Experiences of hundreds or thousands of men are not wrong!
This post is also available in: German